Finding the Right Words: Writing a Meaningful Eulogy

Delivering a eulogy is both an honor and a responsibility. It can also feel overwhelming.

How do you capture a lifetime of memories, experiences, and love in just a few minutes? 

At Keohane, we often remind families that there is no "perfect" eulogy. The most meaningful tributes are not necessarily the most polished; they are the most sincere. If you've been asked to speak at a funeral or memorial service, these simple tips can help get you started. 

Start with the person, not the performance 

It's natural to feel anxious about delivering a eulogy. But remember, those gathered aren't expecting a polished performance; they are there to celebrate a life well lived. Rather than worrying about giving the perfect speech, focus on sharing heartfelt memories and honoring your loved one’s life. 

Before diving into the writing process, ask yourself: 

• What made this person unique? 
• What qualities did people admire most about them? 
• What moments best capture who they were? 

Share a few meaningful stories 

Often, the stories we tell reveal more than a list of accomplishments ever could. Think about the moments that illustrate your loved one's character. Reflecting on a treasured family tradition, a funny memory, or a simple act of kindness can serve as a powerful tribute. 

Include the milestones that mattered 

A eulogy does not need to cover every detail of someone’s life, but it can help to highlight meaningful chapters such as family relationships, career accomplishments, community involvement, hobbies and passions, faith or spiritual beliefs, and causes they cared about. These details help paint a fuller picture of the life that was lived. 

Speak from the heart 

It's natural to feel emotional while delivering a eulogy. Pausing to gather your thoughts, taking a sip of water, or even shedding a few tears is perfectly acceptable. Consider writing the tribute in the way you naturally speak. Using your own voice often feels more genuine than trying to sound formal or poetic. 

Keep it concise 

Most eulogies are between five and ten minutes long, which is typically about 500 to 1,000 words. If you've written more than that, consider narrowing your focus to the stories and messages that best capture the essence of your loved one. 

Ask for help if you need it 

You don't have to go it alone. Family members and friends are usually more than happy to provide stories, memories, and perspectives that can help shape the message. Some people choose to have someone else review what they've written, while others decide to share the speaking responsibilities with another loved one. 

At Keohane, we are honored to guide families through every aspect of planning a meaningful service. If you have questions about writing a eulogy or creating a personalized tribute for your loved one, our team is here to help. 



By sharing memories of a life well lived and speaking honestly from the heart, eulogists have the time-honored opportunity to preserve a loved one’s legacy and capture the enduring impact one person can have on so many lives.